What is meant by the quote is that in this society, like everything else what you say and do is not enough, it is what you think that really counts. That is why this society is policed by the Thought Police and not by typical law enforcement because the only thing that matters to the Party and Big Brother is absolute loyalty within which can only be monitored through the thoughts. The quote is quite literal in its meaning, confessing with your tongue is not betrayal, you can say anything they want to hear and it is not true betrayal. The same goes for ones actions, you can act as though you betray someone, but in this society even that is not proof enough of betrayal. You have to think it and feel it with your entire being to make it so. When Winston finally betrays Julia he wishes the worst thing in the world for him upon her and in that wish, with his entire being, he finally betrayed her.
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